All this talk lately about death and funerals (granted, it was ME talking) has made me re-evaluate where I am in life. Do I need to make changes? How much can I expect to accomplish with such a short time left? I was chatting with a dear old friend, Julie, about untimely death when she pointed out to me that as healthy a we are we could realistically only expect another 20 good years – if we don’t drop dead tomorrow.
That realization makes those goal-setting rules I learned in my thirties far more important now than they were during the decade when I felt immortal and ignored the rules. Unfortunately my memory is gone and I only remember half the rules. At least I think I remember half the rules – I may only remember 1/3 of the rules. Well, anyway, I remember a few.
First: Have dreams. Do we even know what our dreams are anymore? How often we get caught up in day to day survival and forget the things that used to put the spark in our lives. We deny passion as a youthful emotion, and accept our lackluster lives as normal "at our age." "Our age" is when we should be free to enjoy passion in everything we do without the obligatory guilt that accompanied passion when it was more about matters of the flesh and less about self-fulfillment.
In the movie, Joe Versus the Volcano, downtrodden Joe lived his life in shades of gray as he went to a job where he was anonymous, and dealt daily with a chronic illness that his imagination had created. Not until he was told he had a limited amount of time to live did he begin living his life fully. We’re at that point now. We have an incurable disease called old age and we must grab hold of life as Joe did and live every moment fulfilling our dreams. If you haven’t seen Joe Versus the Volcano, begin your goal-setting journey by renting the DVD.
If Joe doesn’t inspire you to question your life and find your dreams, find something that does. A vacation alone, or even an hour a day in a bath by candlelight will help you define the way you want your life to be. Question every aspect of your life – your job, your hobbies, your marriage, your social life. Do they make you happy, can you improve them, do you keep them the way they are only because they are comfortable? Comfort is great in furniture, but it can really stall your personal goals.
After you identify the dreams that could make you truly happy, write them down. Make the dreams very specific. The more specific your dreams, the easier it will be to create a plan to attain them. Then, of course, you have to work on the plan. Remember that the steps to getting what you want should make you happy while you’re on your way. The little elves that sang, “Whistle While You Work” had the right idea. The journey is part of the dream. Make it fun.
Check your progress regularly. Not once a year – you don’t have time for that – but once a week. Have you taken any of the steps in your plan this week? Give yourself a mental grade on your progress. If you got below a B, promise yourself you’ll do better next week. There’s always room for improvement, but if you’re getting a B or above on your life goal report card, you’re doing better than average. Keep it up.
Give yourself a reward for your progress. Promise yourself an afternoon in the park, coffee with friends or a facial every time you get a step closer to your dream. We were meant to dream. We just have to wake up and do it.
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